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Thanks to our petrol-head 18-month-old, I’ve seen the Cars movies a few times now. As per my recent rant about Andy and Hattie, I’ve been getting some ideas about how it all came to be. And it’s a little creepy. For starters, when I first began theorising, Bruce told me there were dark corners of the Internet where many people had already done this with disturbing conclusions. Honestly, I was thinking along the “The machines won” train of thought, but when that suggested there might be skeletons inside these cars I backed off for some more thinking. Finally, in Cars 2 there is a moment where there are cars drinking in a pub, followed by a moment where they show the Queen. This is where it all makes perfect sense and explains what happened. Humans still live. They’re IN the cars. What happened? Well, they’re cyborgs. Robotic enhancements became the norm during a time where drive-through everything was in vogue. No-one actually wanted to leave their cars as it was just way too convenient to use drive-through all the time. So, when people started modifying their bodies they went all-out and attached themselves to their cars. Maybe it was a status symbol too. Perhaps they can detach themselves from their cars, but they choose not to as the body inside is a frail, embarrassing piece of flesh. There are probably hippie communes of regular-looking people still about, but no-one in the mainstream lifestyle cares for that sort of life. Over time, people did as people do and they began to create eyes and other personable features for the cars, so they’re more like avatars than regular cars. This also explains why some older folk may have chosen older-style cars. There are still a lot of unanswered questions, which Bruce is sure to remind me every time we see an image from Cars, which is every time we open a catalogue or visit a shop. Perhaps there’s some room for a story exploring the gradual conversion to this world. Or maybe someone’s already written it.

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